Alpha

Posted on April 13, 2010 by R. Mowat| 2 Comments

Well, the pregnancy is over. I’m not the only person to be anxious in the countdown to birth. For nearly all of my life labour was a mystery. If I considered childbirth at all in my minds eye, it would have been a montage of television births, mostly consisting of “my water broke” moments with a healthy addition of screaming and “you did this to me” accusations. So I was anxious about the forthcoming childbirth – but I am no longer anxious about that, since it is over. Instead, I’m anxious about a thousand other things.

Atticus Sleeping

Atticus Sleeping

For instance: my son is sleeping peacefully right now in his bassinet. So peacefully, in fact, that I cannot even see his chest moving, or hear his breathing. And that scares the hell outta me.

He is breathing, of course, reacting quickly (and acting a little annoyed) to my touching his ear.

And so far – knock on wood – he is sleeping and eating very well. I think of these two activities as being intricately linked. Eat well, sleep well. Could be a slogan for a hotel chain that serves an excellent steak.

I could go into nearly endless details about breastfeeding technique. I won’t. Suffice it to say that it isn’t as easy as you might think. Breastfeeding is both completely natural and not natural at all. It takes time and practice to get right. But putting in that time and effort will net great rewards for mother and child. Aside from J’s persistence and research, we owe gratitude to one of our nurses from the Royal University Hospital – thanks Anita.

We do of course have a long list of other people to thank. I’ll mention them in future posts!

Oh, by the way, his name is Atticus. Atticus Henry Hutchinson Mowat. It’ll be awhile for that to roll off his tongue. Ours too.

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Posted in Beginnings and Endings, Labour & Birth

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Countdown

Posted on March 22, 2010 by R. Mowat| 2 Comments

Well, our first child should arrive anytime within the next two weeks.

J reports that her obstetrician will start physically urging resolution to this pregnancy next Monday. According to advanced technology (measuring tape) our soon-to-be-first-born is rather large.

Good thing we are completely and utterly and totally prepared.

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Posted in The Pregnancy, Third Trimester

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The Happiest Baby?

Posted on March 12, 2010 by R. Mowat| 1 Comment

Last night, J and I attended an iteration of The Happiest Baby Workshop. Some of you will know exactly what that means, and an image of a smiling Kevin-Kline-looking chap will pop into your head. I however, had no idea. My last minute google research turned up reference to a “fourth” trimester, which inevitably caused my skepticism bone to tingle.Happy baby

Actually, it was a very interesting affair. For one, the presenter was articulate and engaging – which always helps – and the concept (that fourth trimester) isn’t actually too wacky.

The essential of what I learned was that babies need help in learning to calm themselves. This point in particular reminded me of a conversation I had several months back with a brand new first-time mom. She said she just assumed that when babies are tired they will go to sleep, but that she’d just realized that they haven’t learned how to go sleep and that they need a bit of help. And when I heard her say that, it made some sense. And here I was hearing it repackaged in another way: the missing fourth trimester.

Dr. Harvey Karp, the man behind the Happiest Baby, argues that human babies are born too early in their development. That other mammals give birth to more developed offspring (think of a foal rising to its feet almost immediately after being born). But human physiology prevents our babies from developing further in the womb. For one, their heads are still very flexible at nine months so that they can be squeezed along a rather narrow opening. A firmly set skull would require a c-section every time.

But one of the things that allow baby’s to survive at this stage of development is an innate set of reflexes. For instance, crying. But Karp also suggests there is an innate “calming reflex” within a baby. This makes sense if you think about a baby in a womb and waiting to be born. Babies are active in the womb, but they also settle down. If they didn’t settle down, and kept those arms and legs moving around, it would be very difficult to give birth. Likely most babies wouldn’t be head down, for instance. But something within the baby allows it to relax, to calm down. Karp argues that this reflex can be triggered postpartum through stimulation that mimics the baby’s womb experience. He suggests the Five S’s: swaddling, side/stomach position, shushing, swinging, sucking.

Swaddling, for example, recreates the closed-in feeling of the womb. Shushing reproduces the sounds a baby hears in the womb (mostly a near-whitenoise blend of heart beats and blood rushing).

The concept seems straightforward and reasonable.

In the execution of the idea, there are little quirks and techniques. For instance, you are supposed to follow the Five S’s in order (not jump to swinging, for instance). But I think we’ll give this approach a try.

Anyone had success with this approach? Anyone experienced utter failure?

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Image courtesy of creative commons on flickr.com and tedsblog

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Posted in Parenthood, The Pregnancy, Third Trimester

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A Last Name – Part 2

Posted on March 8, 2010 by R. Mowat| 4 Comments

In the grand scheme of human language, surnames do not have a long history. Their use is sporadic and ill-defined throughout the ancient Greek and Roman civilizations – and typically they indicate clan membership, as opposed to an unique lineal relationship, especially among the aristocracy – but by the 5th century, the use of family names had been abandoned. The beginning of their use in English is traced to the Norman invasion of the 11th century, with common usage coming centuries later. In other places, the use of surnames is a new phenomena: Netherlands (1811), Japan (1870s), Thailand (1920), and Turkey (1934). In some places they don’t exist at all, including Iceland.

The current mayor of Los Angeles, Antonio Villaraigosa, adopted a new surname combining his original surname with that of his spouse’s.

In any case, my hope for the past year or so, was that a logical method for choosing a last name would present itself. Alas, I’m starting to suspect that J will go into labour and we still will not have decided.

J and I did discuss some interesting last names, each with their own particular rationale (for instance, J and I were engaged to be married in Banff):

  • Banff
  • Blairmore
  • Exley
  • Kelsey
  • Leapark
  • Snow, Snowdon/Snowden
  • Vaughn
  • West

But as the carefree days come to an end, J and I are gripped by the likelihood of giving our newborn the last name of Mowat or Hutchinson, and not something more…creative.

At the moment, the Hutchinson clan and the Mowat clan are in the same boat: no further sons to carry the last name on into the future, beyond the current generation: ie, myself and my brother-in-law Kyle. That really doesn’t mean as much to me as it once maybe did. Nevertheless, it is a small consideration to make, I suppose.

There are, I fear, even tougher decisions on the horizon.

Continue reading →

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Posted in Beginnings and Endings, The Pregnancy

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A Last Name

Posted on March 3, 2010 by R. Mowat| 4 Comments

Last night, J and I found ourselves in a discussion about last names. We didn’t have a problem coming up with some awesome and agreeable first names. We’ll both be happy with quite a few different ones. But we’ve struggled with the last name.

When J and I were married, I was fairly adamant that she retain her last name. I felt it was an important symbol of the type of marriage I expected.

But it has caused a bit of an issue about what last name our kids(s) should have.

One of the key points is that all of us – parents and kid(s) – should have the same last name. Which means that at least one person will need to change their last name.

I think for me this means a legal name change, but retaining the use of our current last names publicly. When we go to the airport with our passports, they all have the same last name, but we’d still get mail and such in our original last names. I suppose this might be confusing, but I see it as kinda like having an alias. Or being an actor with a stage name. Which is kinda fun.

I don’t think J is sold on that idea.

But the main point is what would that new last name be.

There are five main methods for giving a child its last name:

  • Use the father’s last name;
  • Use the mother’s last name;
  • Use a hyphenated version of the father’s and mother’s last name;
  • Sons will get the father’s last name and daughters will get the mother’s last name (or 1st kid gets father’s/mother’s last name, 2nd kid gets the other’s); and,
  • A completely new last name will be created (using, or not using, elements of the parents’ last names).

Recently J has said that the fourth idea might have merit.

All along I have been advocating for the last idea: a completely new last name – the problem remains, however, just what would that last name be?

I’d be curious to find out everyone’s opinions on this issue.

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Posted in Beginnings and Endings, The Pregnancy

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