Category Archives: First Trimester

Travelling Through Time

Last night, J and I finally went to see The Time Traveler’s Wife at the Galaxy cinema. We had read the book five years ago; J in our first apartment, and I during a Christmas trip to England. At the time, the book was fantastic. It is on my list of scheduled re-reads.

The Time Traveler's Wife

The books relies on a central conceit – the time travelling – that one must simply accept. Once disbelief is properly suspended, the time-travelling metaphor works wonders in subsequently illuminating the human experience. In particular, relationships between couples (and maybe especially men and women), relationships with friends and family, our experience of memory, and our struggles with life and death. It is a relatively simple and straightforward story and brilliantly makes the reader consider the narrative of their own life.

The film version does an effective job of recapturing this. The plot is plainer, but with the added tools available in the cinema, the same emotions and understandings are properly evoked.

This was a difficult movie to watch for me.  Seeing birth and death so vividly portrayed and distilled into visceral narrative essences while I am still struggling with understanding the recent passing of my father and the imminent arrival of my first-born child left me feeling hopeless and lost in spite of my usual stoic resolution with the universe.

But this morning the shadow has passed.

And I was thinking also about how often J and I will be going to the movies a year from now. I can recall many parents bemoaning their lack of ‘date-nights’ and other personal/couple outings. Will this be us too? Will we care if it is?

Weekend with the Nephews

What a weekend! Two very chatty young boys! A dog. A new place. Staying the weekend. And I had to work two day this weekend too!

Is this parenting thing going to work?!

No, I’m not complaining (besides, J handled most of it), it I guess I’m the type of guy who wades into fresh water and this was diving right in!

Sonogram One

In just over an hour, J and I will be nervously waiting while a technician waves a transducer across her jelly-covered belly. That is: it is time for our first ultrasound.

We are more than a little nervous, since J’s first meeting with her obstetrician did not result in the confirmation of a heart beat. But that was a couple of weeks ago. Now 11 weeks in, we should be able to get some sort of results today.

UPDATE: Everything is fine and on track. Heartbeat was about 165 bpm. And the little guy/girl was moving around. It was pretty neat.

For a moment there was a concern(?) that there were twins. Apparently there is a tendon or something in women that can cause the ultrasound to return false mirrored images. But upon closer look it was very clear that there was only one.

Names and Pains

J hasn’t been feeling that great these days. Nauseous – but she hasn’t vomited – and loss of appetite. I’m a little worried that she isn’t eating enough, or at least enough different foods (she’s been inhaling soda crackers pretty fast).

crakers

soda crackers: yum

On the plus side, J and I are getting confident enough about this whole pregnancy thing to discuss possible names. Like many people, no doubt, we had an existing shortlist of favourite names. In particular, J likes the names Olivia and Sophie (girls) and Nathaniel and Henry (boys). This all seemed to make sense before we were pregnant. Now, however, the names are ever-less abstract and ever-more personal. Will these names suit our child?

And because things weren’t difficult enough already, J and I have different last names and thus need to make some big decisions about the child’s *last* name also. J’s point-of-view to date has been to give the child my last name as his/her last name, and give the child J’s last name as a middle name. I’m not convinced. And because I often go my own way, I’m advocating a completely new last name for our children.

We’ll see how this goes.